Whine

This is just a warning for any of you who may come in contact with me sometime in the next three weeks.

I am there. That point. The "if you so much as raise your eyebrow at me, I may snap" point. I find myself replying sharply to Brad quite often now and then two seconds later saying, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm just too uncomfortable to be nice." And I really am sorry. I don't mean to snap, it just so happens that everything that comes out of my mouth at this point sounds that way.

The pressure on the inside of my body right now is equivalent to the amount of force that causes a bullet to leave a gun. And my mouth is that gun.

This kid is huge. A lot of people tell me that I don't look as pregnant as I am. That's because the baby has made him/herself at home right back up against my kidneys. My stomach doesn't have to get much bigger this time because the baby just keeps rearranging my organs to create a little pocket for his living room. I'm sure by now the feng shui placement in there is optimal for maximum flow of good chi. Too bad the baby is using it all up. I really could use some good chi right now. What is "chi" anyway? Guess I'll have to settle for a chocolate malt.

Yes, I want the baby to be born healthy. Yes, I know my induction date is only twenty days away. Yes, I know that whining is unflattering. I should be reveling in the last twenty days that I will EVER be pregnant. I should be memorizing the incredible miracle of feeling my unborn child's movements. I should be out buying diapers.