Photogenic I am not

Today I saw a picture of myself from a month or so after Memphis was born. You know, I really shouldn't have been let out of the house at all. Between the ill-fitting clothing, the wild hair, and all of that extra weight, I'm surprised small children weren't screaming in terror. If they weren't the last pictures taken before a dear friend moved away I would demand that they be destroyed.

Of course, I NEVER like pictures of myself and I do everything I can to remain behind the camera and not in front of it. I push little old ladies out of my way while trying to get out of the field of view. Well, not really, but don't put it past me. The fact that I thought about it means that I just might be capable of it.

So, for those of you who think that I should be included in more pictures, don't hold your breath.

Cat Condo

I was washing dishes tonight when I happened to glance out in my backyard. There was a thief out there stealing my daughter's red convertible.

We don't have a cat. We don't even want a cat. Well I guess I should revise that. I don't want a cat. They're just not my thing. I don't like it when there is a living thing in my house who thinks they are in control of things. I am in control of things. I refuse to relinquish that control, especially to an animal. This is why I love dogs. They are perfectly happy to just follow you around worshipping the ground you walk on. And they don't talk. They just listen. I love dogs.

Anyway, despite the fact that I don't want a cat, apparently cats want me. I have approximately 4 cats who frequent my backyard. Three of them come and go sporadically and one has taken up residence underneath my shed. I think she (I assume she is a she because I would like her better if she were) may be pregnant. She is really fat.

As long as the cats stay outside and do not leave their...you know, stuff...all over my yard I'm ok with them. But, I may rethink that if they start taking off with our cars.

I think we may be watching too much tv...

A conversation between Carson and I yesterday:

Carson: "May I please have a piece of candy?"

Me: "Tell you what, if you eat all of your dinner you can have a piece of candy. Deal?"

Carson (while nodding her head in agreement): "Or no deal."

Big City Fun

We just got back from a little trip to visit my older brother Billy, sister-in-law Kim, and nephew Hayden. I'm kicking myself now for not getting a picture of them as a family. They live in a big city so shopping and eating are great fun there. They also have a pool and hot tub in their backyard so we did some relaxing too.

Hayden trying to steal Billy's pacifier.

I think the funniest event of the trip happened on the very first day. Carson went outside with Billy so that he could do some maintenance on the pool. She asked him if it would be ok for her to get in and he told her that it was still a little too chilly for the pool but that we would get in the hot tub later. Apparently she heard something different. She came running back toward the house removing her clothing at the same time. It happened so fast that none of us had a chance to react. There she was, completely naked and running back toward the pool. I knew she wouldn't just jump in and it's a good thing because we were all laughing too hard to stop her. Eventually we did get a swimsuit on her.

We had a great time shopping at outlet stores and at IKEA!! I love Ikea and would totally move in there if I could. You know that movie where the girl lives in the Wal-Mart? That's me. In Ikea. They even have baby food there. We'd be all set. Someday I'll write an entire post dedicated to the wonder that is Ikea.

Bill and Kim have a wonderful rat terrier named Katie who makes me want a dog so bad I could cry. And I hate crying. She is so playful and snugly and awesome with the kids. Memphis thought she was a chew toy and she just looked at him, licked the perpetual drool drip off of his bottom lip and went on her way. She kept Carson busy running and chasing and Carson kept her busy with the trail of yummy crumbs she leaves in her wake. We are in the process of trying to bring home a dog of our own. Cross you fingers for us.

Baby Hayden is about 2 months younger than Memphis and is very much a little gentleman. He is highly introspective and logical. He is a snuggle bug and likes his BabyFirst television channel a lot. I want to shoot BabyFirst television. I went to visit them back in October and came home singing this song:

Mommy comes back,

She always comes back,

She never will forget me!

Carson thought the words were:

Mommy comes back,

She never comes back,

She always will forget me!

Anyway, this time I have another song stuck in my head and it may very well be worse than mommy comes back. It goes:

Warm, cold, cold, warm,

Help me find the acorn.

Oh my gosh. Now I know why parents go crazy. It's all the animated animals singing about mommies and acorns.

Hayden is coming to stay with me for about a week in May and I can't help but wonder how he will cope without BabyFirst tv. Maybe Baby Einstein will save us.

The Joys of Vomit

As is common for most winters, this one has been full of wonderful mystery viruses. You know the kind where your child is miserable so you pull them out of bed, struggle to get some decent clothes on them and drag them to the doctor leaving a trail of snot and vomit behind you. At the doctor's office (where several trails of snot and vomit collide) there are children who make you wish you would have just toughed it out at home, but you are still holding on to the hope that there is some miracle cure for you child's ailment. So, if you are anything like me, you make your other kids sit as still as possible, touching only what is absolutely necessary. You see, going to the doctor's office is a bit like running a gauntlet. Chances are you're gonna get smacked. Someone will pick up some fraction of a germ with the corner of their shirt and from there it will multiply.

But, you are willing to brave all of this for the possibility that you may get to walk around the house without carting an inconsolable child on your hip, or sleep all night without having to get up just to give tylenol or rock a miserable baby back to sleep. At the very least you hope your child doesn't have to be as uncomfortable.

While my doctor's office is clean and my doctor is relatively quick to see us, I can't help but think that we are just perpetuating our illnesses by visiting there. I took Memphis to have his ears looked at because he was cranky and pulling on them. They were not infected thank goodness. Four days later I had to take him back because he was coughing really badly and having trouble breathing. Turns out he had croup. Hmmm...croup has an incubation of about 2-5 days. Where do you think he got it?

Wait, it gets better. The day after the croup visit was a Saturday and that's when Memphis started leaking. And by leaking I mean a constant river of the worst diarrhea I have ever encountered and a semi-constant stream of vomit heaving out of his little tiny body. Ok, I know that was gross, but if you're a mother you know what I mean and that statement will have no effect on you whatsoever.

I tried hard to stay away from the doctor's office this time. Alas, almost a week went by and the only change was that he had become so good at vomiting (from all the practice) that he was able to soak not only himself, but also all of me and about 50% of the chair we were sitting in.

So we went back.

All of these things were caused by viruses. Lovely little bugs that I'm 99% sure we picked up at the doctor's office. Why even go?

Next time you can follow the snot and vomit trail from my house to the local bar.

Best of February 2007

Whew! One month closer to Summer. Thank goodness because I'm telling you we can't take much more of this crappy weather or the sickness that it brings.

Memphis is officially on the move! He crawled for the first time on Valentine's Day and then waved bye-bye a couple of days later. Of course he saved the latter for his crush (my friend Nicole). She got his first smile too. I swear, if he wasn't so cute I'd be truly offended. He is also now equipped with his first real weapons: two of the cutest little teeth that I've ever seen.

Carson and Cody continue to crack me up with the things that come out of their mouths. Cody was listening to my heart with her "telescope" and assured me that it is still "beeping." And I'm so glad that I have sent her school to learn because she looked at an outline of the United States and told me it was a turkey. A turkey. There's nothing else I can say about that.

Watch out...there's no stopping him now.

Cody's turn to gag.

This is Cinderella holding her dress up. So she doesn't step on it. Because it is so long.

My Valentines

This is Carson's favorite dress. It's too cold to wear it out of the house, but if we're home she's wearing it.

Every diaper bag should have one of these.

I think he's getting too big for my favorite pajamas :(

Working on those teeth

Infectious

I don't know what I would do if all 3 of them had normal faces in any 1 picture. Thank you Carson.